SHOULD YOU CONFESS TO CHEATING IN A RELATIONSHIP?

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4Infidelity is highly repulsed and shunned in most relationships. Couples usually work hard to remain committed and faithful to one another. If you truly love your partner, you will surely strive to practice zero-grazing, even when you feel the grass might be greener on the other side.

But let us not pretend we are all angels. Having an affair can happen even to the most loyal of partners. And it is not always intentional. Sometimes infidelity can be accidental, perhaps an unintended act of drunkenness or carelessness. If it happens that you lost control at some point, should you confess your horny shagathons to your partner? Is your bag of guilt getting heavier each passing day?

Is your relationship deep enough to survive the aftermath of an affair? Is your lover more likely to dump you the instance they become aware of your amoral ways? Are they willing to not only forgive you; but also forget the episode all-together? Is there a possibility that they might revenge by also cheating on you? Weigh the pros and cons and hey, make up your mind… you cheater!

The adage “What they don’t know won’t hurt them” is a pithy truism to consider. If there’s no way your partner will find about a one-off misdemeanor on a road trip, honesty is not always the best policy. That can of worms is better kept closed.

How is your partner likely to react to the news? They’re obviously not going to dance in joy. But if your partner is always volatile, highly charged and prone to violent explosions, it’s better to keep mum – for your own safety.

There are a few instances whereby conceding is the better way to go. For instance, if your partner’s sexual health is at risk and you fear you’ve just passed them a deadly venereal disease, I’d advice you to confess to the priest as well.

If a friend of your partner catches you in a compromising position such as kissing or banging, please tell your partner about it ASAP. Also, when someone plans to blackmail you or (worse) your naked pictures are doing rounds on Whatsapp; kindly don’t wait for your lover to beat a confession out of you. Ditto too to a situation whereby the illicit lover is carrying your baby.

The consequences of confessing are unknown, don’t expect automatic forgiveness. The choice lies in your hands. Confess embrace the consequences or forever hold back your words and become a better lover. If your partner chooses to forgive you, then you’ve got a lot to prove in the relationship afterwards.

If you decide to take the saintly route and come clean, you’re going to need more than a bar of soap and a bottle shampoo.

BY JOWAL JONES