Controversial issues have a tendency to trend in our generation. A word could have a very innocent meaning in layman’s perception, but not before the youth. Some of these trending controversial issues and topics have raised a lot of concern among the older generation questioning our way of growth. Often we find older generations being at logger heads with the younger generation on some of these topics. But that is not the focus of this piece today.
Recently words like sponsor and fisi became some of the most talked about topics in the country. Sponsor losing its meaning completely. Right now if anyone says, ‘I am looking for a sponsor.’ They will be given ‘the eye’. Its a judgement-filled expression that speaks volumes. People would think of a fat-bellied older man with a lot of money, for the ladies. For the men, it would be an older woman, old enough to be their mother, again with a lot of money. In each case, the older people would have families and only need the younger people for sex. In exchange they get money. Funny how that had a different term for it in the olden days.
Who is a fisi? A Swahili would tell you that’s a hyena. Which is true. But who is a fisi according to the youths? A man who doesn’t let a skirt pass him. Haha… A man who cannot have his pick among the ladies and would therefore prefer all types, at the same time. And never once settling down with one. There could be other definitions to the word, but fact remains, they are men with the hyena attribute attached to them.
I recently did a research on this fisi issue. I interviewed few students from different universities who are self proclaimed fisis. Everyone had their own way of handling being a fisi, and how to be a successful one at that. To be clear, I am not advocating for the team-mafisi, my rib may be among the collateral damage.
These are some of the ways of being a successful fisi in campus according to my research:
According to a friend in Kenyatta University, holding on to one relationship would be your doom. To be a successful fisi, do not be exclusive with anyone. Being single is the key. If one of those divas you see around campus updates on their social media pages that they are single, you are tempted to inbox her and surely you will do. But not for a relationship, just to add to your trophy list. Talk to every lady like they are stars and you have known them all your life.
Be a hugger
The basic greeting routine in most campuses is a hug. It is a very acceptable form of greeting. Nobody does handshakes anymore. If there are, they must be few. However when you hug a lady, the duration of that hug would depend on factors like; How beautiful is she? Is she dating your friend? And most importantly, Who is she in campus?
In a fisis’ case, hugging would be the perfect way to let that lady know what you are trying to communicate. Body language it is. A hug could get you a phone number.
Have model friends and be a model
Surely who will never want to hang around with a model? Who? And if hanging around with them is a trait for fisi then I might be in this group. A student at Laikipia university said having a sense of fashion would guarantee you the ladies. To top that, you will be in her selfie gallery. Models love fashion, models have a say in campus. If your model friend approves of you, you have no problem getting some action from other ladies. And again, ladies love models.
Deny. Deny. Deny.
Deny everything and act like a saint. This is a very important rule among the team mafisi. When you are caught with a different lady, act innocent and when asked later, deny everything. You can even go further to say you do not know who the lady is.
Be a photographer
Photographers are like angels. They make you look more beautiful than anything. The quality of photos they take boosts the esteem of so many people. Ladies love to look good, and how about a photo that does just that? A photographer at the University of Nairobi said he receives calls from ladies who are willing to do anything to get photographed, and avoid paying.
Be a party animal
To some ladies or rather gents the sole reason for being in campus is to escape the parents’ rules. You can not go to any party or even organize one, if you come from a family like mine. Identify a lady who is just beginning to experiment her freedom. Offer to take her to one those campus parties. Be sure not to have two left feet. If you want more ladies, know the DJ. Better still, be a DJ. Live for parties.
I am one those guys who feels they are romantic. When this point was brought across, I did not buy it. However to be a fisi, you apparently need to be romantic. Hold her hand once in a while. Learn some few things that can make her feel special and do them. Do some crazy romantic stuff in public, and your inbox may just explode. Consult a friend on how to be romantic if possible.
Never say you love someone
I always say the phrase “I love you” whenever am in love and I didn’t know it was a curse to my generation. This phrase could get you trapped, and you will find yourself in a relationship. If you are a fisi, do not say these words. Never. It is ok for them to say they love you, buy not vice versa. This is a trap.
Do not be a baby daddy
Nothing screams drama like baby drama. You will have a baby, it was a one night stand. Now anytime you take a girl out for fun, baby mama will know. That’s not the worst part. The worst comes in when you have planned and set aside some money for a fun time out with a girl only to be asked for pampers money.
These are some of the ways one can be a successful fisi in campus. They are not limited to just these, I am sure team mafisi could come up with a book on how they do it. Again, I am not advocating for Ufisi.
(Article by @CalvoMjinga, Varcity Contributor.)