Social media has today become the new dating platform. The sweet candle light dinners, lunch and coffee dates are slowly becoming ancient history and have now been replaced by tweets and Facebook messages. We live in what most people call the ‘Microwave generation’ where everything is ‘pap’ and instant. This sadly applies to everything including love. Love today is equivalent to a mirage of water when one is in a dessert. It is surely not what we think it is.
Gone are the days ladies waited to be told those obvious clichés and classic punch lines by men that left them all smitten and swaying their summer dresses. The guys are either too busy in bars watching the latest football matches or playing video gameswith their mates. The old traditional methods of passing next to a girls’ house to make her notice that you even exist are now just a thing of the past. Men have taken a new leaf in the game of courting especially with the use of advanced technology, where all they need to do is poke the ladies on Facebook and DMed them on Twitter and get noticed.
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The concern is that with our advanced technology and a generation that will stop at nothing to get what they want instantly, love is at a risk of loosing its real meaning. People are rushing in and out of relationships. Some of us live in a world of fantasy where we want our lives to be more or so like a movie or soap opera that we recently saw over a cup of coffee. Do beliefs like ‘love at first sight’ even exist or is it that we want it to be just one of those ‘Déjà vu’ experiences? We need to come back to reality and realize that love is not just another game of chess but is something quite serious.
M.Scott Peck, the author of the book, The Road Less Travelled has elaborated properly the concept of falling in love.
‘Falling in love is not an act of will. It is not a conscious choice. We are likely to fall in love with someone we are obviously ill matched as someone suitable. We can choose how to respond to the experience of falling in love, but we can not choose the experience itself.’
Scott’s concept of love is sensible but is however contrary to the present world that we live in. We have made love to be something that we rush in and out at anytime. Love is surely not a thing to be put on at will like a dinner jacket. Everything great comes at a price so take your time and let things take their course.
By Gloria Kinyanjui.